Grrr.....

I hate my job.. I really hate my job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Actually I don't really hate my job. Just that there is someone in my office who scold me a lot. I mean a lot of thing I am in the process of learning. And at times I ask a simple question, she scold me for not knowing these small thing. How sad can that be? Haih~~ Understand lah I got a lot of things to do. I believe that she too have lotsa things to do. Just that don't bother me for a while can ah? Furthermore she is not even my boss. Just my senior. She is an executive.
Honestly I felt like quitting the job or either way transfer to Kampar so that I can avoid her. Let her do my work. I was employed to ease her burden but now it seems I am an extra burden to her. If I leave, then she die la. Cause the things is there is not enough finance staff in the company. In fact the company is looking forward to hire more staff but it seems there is no many ppl want to work there. Don't know lah.. She make me feel like quitting though. Haih!~~ Don't know how long more I can go on with her character.
Anyway thank God Thursday is a public holiday. Can rest and enjoy at the same time. With that in mind, Happy Holiday to everybody just in case I do not wish anybody Happy Holiday.. God bless.. =)

Updates

I had not been blogging for the past one week oredi.. Actually I spent not much of time blogging since nowadays my lunch is occupied with lunch with colleagues outside of my office. Last time (I mean two week ago) I always ta pau and eat in the office just to blog during my lunch hour. Well here I am blogging just to update a lil bit of myself of what has been happening for the past of my life.
Here goes.. Last week until today was quite an interesting week for me. First of all, I received something special from someone whom I cared a lot. Well won't say what special thing is that. Neither would I actually say who the person is. But then I really appreciate that something special though. Thanks a lot. Never had it before... =) Then a terrible thing happened on Friday. Well my slack's zip spoilt. Therefore throughout that whole day I was working with my zip on. Ok. Let me share the story then. That time was an hour before lunch time. I was in the toilet. You know lah... What did we usually do in the toilet? Anyway as I zipped my slack, the zip suddenly stucked. Something like that happened la. So I pulled hard and eventually the zip spoilt. So I had an 'opened' pant. Understand what I mean? I do not know how to describe it in words. Sorry I guess I do have a grammatical mistake there. Anyway I was panicked. Thought of take half a day leave off. Can't figure any reason for the leave in case my boss ask. Well honestly saying there are more girls than guys in the office. So therefore I do not want them to found out what is going on. Thank God I told one of my colleague. He told me to get needle and thread to sew it off. Well honestly saying I do not know how to sew a spoilt zip. But I still carry on and I sew the entire place where the zip is located. As I sew it, I was wondering how in the world would I pee. I mean at least for a sari, the girls can unwrap themselves before they do their business but for a sewed zip? Furthermore I took a large amount of water before that. Anyway at the end I managed to pee after I tear off the sewed zip. =) Thank God. That was my 2nd spoilt zip since the first time I start working. Don't know why am I so lucky to get it. Haih~~ Perhaps I had gained some weight though. To my dismay, I weight myself two weeks back and found out that I actually gained 5 extra kgs which totalled up to 70kg. Imagine 70kg. Whatever la.. Hopefully as I slow in my eating condition and eat less, I would lose some weight though. Otherwise I would have problems with all my working clothes. =(
Anyway I got a Kai Jie who is leaving to UK on 30th January. Well she is hired in UK to work temporary as a pharmacist there. If I am not mistaken. Well what to do. Now is 30th Jan and she is leaving in less than 48 hours time. Hopefully she would be having a good life there. =) God bless you Pui Ee Jie Jie. =) Hope you are going to have a nice day there and do not forget me. =) If you are reading this blog, do remember that I shall remember you always. Remember me always too ya.. God bless.. =) Anyway my other Jie Jie, Gloria Jie Jie's birthday were yesterday. 29th January. Well may God bless you, Gloria Jie Jie.. May you have a blessed birthday and Happy 30th Birthday.. Oppss... I told ppl your age.. =p Anyway God bless and always keep in touch.. If you are reading this as well, do remember that you shall always be dear to me and I shall always remember you in my heart.. This two Jie Jie are close to me even though they had left KDU 10 years ago. We still keep in touch and always wishes each other whenever we can. God bless you two..
Anyway me also going to leave soon.. I mean leave this blog of course. Therefore before I leave I would like to say God bless.. And Good Night.. =)

Christian conference

There would be a Christian conference held in PJEFC, Lasting Heritage, Petaling Jaya next Thursday and Friday (25th & 26th January 2007) organised by RBC. The talks is about the book of Phillipian of how to serve God. The conference starts about 7pm and ends bout 10.30pm. I urgue everyone please come for the conference. One thing is for sure. The conference is free. We do not need to pay anything for it. Just go and listen. I am going. It is because I wanna learn God's Word and am able to help myself and others when needed.
Honestly it is important for us to go for conferences. I mean if one cannot go then its too bad la. But if one can go please go. Well the intention is to learn God's Word more. We are there because we want to learn. I am not saying that when we go there we use the knowledge that we have from the conference to serve others but we go there we want the knowledge and learn to apply it in our daily life. In fact I suggest that whatever we learn there may it help us to build ourselves up. To serve ourselves. Not so much of serving others. My idea of serving is this. If you can't serve yourself, meaning care for yourself, love yourself and allowing God to deal with yourself, then for me it is of no point we want to serve others. This is because when we do not show love to ourselves how can we love others. I for one, am something like that. I can't love myself. But of course I want to love God. But I can do nothing if I can't love myself. For one thing, I am low-self esteem guy. Very very low. And my mind is super negative. I felt useless and stupid almost all the time when I can't handling problems. Most of the time I leave it as it is. Not wanting to solve the problem cause I do not know what to do. That's how negative am I. When my mind is super negative, how can I believe in myself that whatever I say or write or blog is true if I can't trust myself. In fact even whatever I wrote here now I do not think. I just write whatever I want to write. I do not think when I write. I just write. That's why it is a bit long-winded. But thank God that He had helped gain a little bit higher self-esteem. Now I am able to love myself bit by bit oredi. But progressing la.. =)
What I do that gives me such confidence? Well I learnt and read His Word, the Bible. In fact I went to quite few conferences as well. I mean to gain more insight of certain issues in my life. It is to help me to be healed and to allow God to speak to me. Therefore do not think that whatever we learnt from going to a conference is a must to serve God and mankind. But I felt that it is rather more for our own self than others. Of course la, don't go there empty-handed. Went there with notebook and pen with you. It is important to jot down notes from the speaker. After all it is not always a speaker from oversea would come to Malaysia to speak. Therefore please do not miss this opportunity then. =)
Anyway let us learn God's Word together and together we shall receive His wisdom and knowledge, Amen? God bless.. =)

Serving mentality

I had came to learn something new these days. A lot of time we define God loves us and would bless us when we serve Him with all our heart, soul and life. In fact, I believe that it is the primary way to be blessed by God nowadays, according to ppl's asumption.
Well I had come to learn that God love us equally no matter we are serving Him or not. I mean come on.. If we serve Him, would He had eye on us more than those who don't serve Him? Define me the meaning of serving.. Is it because we must serve Him then only He would bless us? I mean indeed serving is important but if we serving Him without a purpose, should I say serve with love, then it actually defeat the whole purpose of serving. I mean we are serving God because we love Him and wanted to do His will, but if we were told to serve God but not given the purpose of why we should serve Him, then we are no different than the robots. Robots are created by human being to ease human's job. But are they given the reason why they were told to do what they are supposed to do? No.. They are not.. They are just programmed to serve the mankind for mankind's purpose. So are we like the robots?
I am not saying we should not serve in church, as a full time minister or whatsoever things like that.. In fact, I encouraged everybody to do so.. But for those who don't serve, please do not condemn or rebuke or even avoid them for who knows they are actually serving God in some other way in some other place. I mean if we are doing a small small things like driving ppl to church it is considered as serving God. I mean accompanying ppl to church is considered as well as serving. Be there for somebody and to guide them to know God is also part and parcel of serving God. So why not those who are serving God in the church be there as well for those who are not serving in the church? I mean ain't that fair? Even as I blog here about serving I am also serving our BIG GOD. You know why? Cause I am glorifying His name. So why we need to construct how we serve God in the eye of man and not on God? Let those who are serving in private be in private and let those who serve in public serve in public. For there are some who would serve God fully but yet be neglected. For I believe everybody needs everybody. Just that how much you would want to be with that somebody who serve God beyond the church territory, who you think is useless and not fruitful if they are not serving in the church, who you think cannot be helped anymore if they are not serving in the church. In fact who you think is not as popular as those who are serving in the church. How much would you want to care for them? I believe they, too deserve cares and love even though they are not serving in the church. Just be considerate and open ourselves to God and let not the big box mentality be filled in our mind. Cause we cannot contain God in a big box. We should think beyond that big box and let Him lead us to serve Him with all our hearts in His ways.
Therefore let us be used by God in His ways and not ours. In all that we do, let us pray and learnt to listen from Him, Amen? God bless... =)

Contented life

I am now kinda settled myself in UTAR.. For one thing, I was told that I am improving a lot in my work there. Well perhaps la. One thing is for sure. I had prayed and prayed for God's favour in my working place that everybody there would find favour in me. That includes my own department colleagues and even my own department bosses. Well they treat me very nice. I mean my bosses. =) In fact, I found out that my big boss is a very nice guy although his joke might be a lil bit sarcastic. No offend ya, sir. He is very polite and well he is nice man.
As for other department bosses, I find they all also very interesting. Some of them can crack joke with me. Is it because I am from finance department that they do that or is it because of their nature behaviour that they do this? Well I would never know bout that. I would say this la. I felt that I am very blessed in the sense that God had given me good working environment although at times, I had painful eyes due to the reflection from the computer screen. But other than that, I am doing well in the company. For this I wanna thank God for giving me a good PR skill although I never learnt it in college last time. I guess it is just something so natural that came out of me. Anyway with this so-called skill where I learnt to smile a lot to everybody collegues I met, say "thank you" to everybody I met, wishing them all the going-to-be festive seasons helps me a lot in communicating with them. At times I do joke with them. But I guess my smile to them is sufficient enough to make them felt welcome. And at times I would help them when there is a chance to do so.. But of course not all the time la.. =)
I was officially confirmed in my job as an admininstrative assistant last Wednesday, 3rd January 2007. Of course before that I got fearful thought that I might be sacked if I ever do wrong. But guess what? I am wrong.. It was of course my dream came true. Thank God He guided me and kept me safety throughout the whole half a year last year. Otherwise I would not be able to survive in my job. So therefore I am taking this opportunity to thank God for all He had done for me. In fact, I counted it as a precious gift from God for my birthday last year from Him for me. Thank You Lord Jesus for helping and guiding me throughout my journey walking with You. May Your name be glorify always and always and always... and forever be glorify.. =) May this year's working and social life and in fact the most important life of my entire life, my Spiritual walk would be a better and more authentic than last year. Help me to grow and to know the truth and able to help those who are in need to grow as well.. For I have nothing to offer to You, Lord but myself. So use me and make me Your vessel for others to know You. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.. =)
So with this I hope that my life this year would be more fruitful and more happening and I shall learnt to know His will more. For without Him, I am nothing. God bless... =)

Happening day leading to angry and sad night...

Yesterday was quite fun. Well managed to met with two old friend of mine. One of them is a friend whom I meet a minimum of twice a year and usually we meet up for both mine and her birthday. Yesterday we meet up was for my birthday. So I am going to meet her again next month just for her birthday. We were actually born exactly 2 months apart. And our routine place aka "old place" is actually KLCC's either Burger King or KFC. It is located towards each other. Anyway it was quite fun though. Both of us went shopping in KLCC after the lunch and her favourite spot is Isetan KLCC. =) All these while going out with her, it has been her favourite shopping haven. And as usual I tag along accompanying her to buy her clothes.
Then at night I received a call from another old friend of mine. We went out yumcha after I came back home from KLCC. Although it was short meet-up, but it was fun, able to see her again. =) Then after the meeting, went to Blitzone for a while. What I saw from friendster really makes me angry and hurt though. I received a meesage from friendster yesterday from someone most of us would have know. The CF and I and this girl went to Swensen last year's Merdeka Eve and we took pictures together. Then there is this one picture of me and her taken together of which she thinks is pretty ugly were uploaded in my friendster profile. Of course it was not my primary photo for friendster. Just another picture uploaded there. And the first time when she told me to delete that picture, I do not want to cause after all these years we rarely took any picture together and this was one of the nicest picture we ever take. And now she told me delete it. So I did not delete it. Her 2nd reply was this: "If I were not to delete that picture off, she will not want be my friend anymore." I was like, "What nonsense is this?" Just for a friendster picture you want to break our friendship? Is our friendship cost that one picture? So if I were to delete the picture we are friend? If not we are enemy? And to think of it that way, I felt that she is not just insecure but she is also childish. And of all these while she had been commenting to me before that I am childish and she is mature. Guess what? She is 26 years old this year. And the way she talk sounds like a kid.
I mean I cherish the picture because it was one of the picture that we took. We rarely took any picture together (listen.. two of us together without anybody standing beside us). I think even a 3 year old kid also not that childish. What the hell?? Brought her to the KDU Christian Fellowship camp last year to Port Dickson. She wanted to go but she could not afford. So I choose to sacrifice my fee for the camp to pay for her and allow her to go. I prefer she go and not me. Well you may call me stupid but I felt that she should go and not me. Although I need to ikat perut and save up for the trip I want her to learn God's Word there more instead of me. I felt that she deserved it more than I do. And my only blessing for her were my saved up money. I managed to go is also because a bro in Christ lend me the money. At the end she scolded me throughout the trip for all the activities that had been organised in the camp. She never even thanked me for making it possible for her to go. Not to say that I want her thanks but rather I want her to be thankful in everything that she got. Instead she were sulking throughout the camp. My mom loves to call me "ungrateful dog" last time when I was young for not obeying her. Well I felt that now she deserve that title. Not to say that I should call her a dog per se, but rather she is so ungrateful. To think of that way, a lot of time when I met her, she would tell me her Christian thelogy and how she knows so many things about God. Well let me show her something. Sorry to say this but FUCK HER la. Sorry.. I don't really use such word but then I am not happy bout her. She says she know God but did she go to church? Nope. Did she pray? I wouldn't know but how I wish she would. At least I could changes in her. And she is going out with a non-believer. I used to pray a lot for her. Now I felt like I wanna give up oredi because she treats me like a shit. And our friendship costs a picture in the friendster. And guess what? I love her a lot. Understand what type of love I mean ere?
Well I am going to wait for her reply from friendster. If she still insists of breaking off friendship because of that stupid bloody photo, then too bad lor.. There goes our friendship. Will update in blog again.. God bless...

There goes 2006 and here comes 2007

Today is officially the first day of 2007 which is also the beginning of a lot of things to come. Well I am still in the midst of dreaming, the dream where I still thought that I am in the mood for Christmas and my birthday and cannot even believe that the month of December of 2006 had just passes by. One thing I had to admit, as I grow a year older, it also meant that a year is going to end. But the month that I really miss throughout the year of 2006 would be the month of December.
Last month or shall I say December'06 was the most happening for me throughout the whole 12 months of 2006. For one thing, I am able to celebrate Christmas in a more happening mode. First of all as I had blogged bout it in few previous blogs, I attended quite a few nice Christmas parties and the food prepared were the nicest I ever ate since I attend such parties. But thank God for all the food that I had eaten, I am still having the same weight as I had before the meal. I also had the opportunity to attend Christmas Carols and attend Christmas dinner, a steamboat buffet organised by my colleauges and house warming organised by Xi Ying on the 30th. Thanks Xi Ying.
My other favourite celebration of the year would be my birthday. I love both birthday celebrations; namely 16th December 2006 where the CFers sang Christmas Carols for me. Imagine in KFC One Utama. That was one of the most memorable birthday celebration from you guys. Thanks again. Then there is this celebration in One Utama again. But this time in Pizza Hut. Well this celebration was also very nice because we went to bowling alley after dinner. Not to forget first time I met Sharon in skirt. =) But thanks you guys. Thanks for making my birthday a memorable celebration. I thought the year 2004 was the best but come to think of it now, it is no longer that happening anymore cause the birthday celebration of mine in 2006 is the most happening celebration. Thanks. You all had indeed make my day that two days. Without you all, my birthday celebration would be just a normal another day of the year with nothing nice and good to be remember at all.
Btw the month of December is the most memorable month of the year because it was where we all enjoyed each other's companion. I mean with all the games like bowlings, foosball, pool and even the board game of risk. It does built up a lot of fellowship with all those good games. Although I spent quite a lot of money for last month with you all, I felt that it is worth my time and money. The reason is because spending time with you all means a lot to me. It helps me that to realise that no one can be alone. Not even God. Cause if God can stay alone, then what is the point He create us? Thanks for making me realise that.
Let us just hope that the year of 2007 would be another good for us all to grow and know each other better. In fact it would be a year where we would in the Lord more and more. Have a blessed New Year ahead and may our good God bless you always.. God bless... =)