God's mercy on me....

Well recently a lot of things happened... I mean starting from early this year itself. It is not something small though but rather it looks big and complicated and a lot of time I do not want to brought that memory back into my life but it does. Well God does. One of it would be my unforgiveness and bitterness towards ppl.
Bout a month ago, a friend of mine came to me after about two years of misssing in action (MIA). Well he had not been going to church and sort of slacking in Him. I do not know why he had come to me but later on I know why he had come to me. Well somehow or rather deep down within me I apologise to him for making my life miserable. He was one of the person in previous CF friends that brought me bitterness. So to say lah. Anyway I know this friend of mine is reading my blog.. Hey friend... I hope you don't mind me writing things down in my blog ya.. There is no name mentioned here so that no one would get embarrasement here, ok? Anyway later on he share with me his experience and his lacking in God. Well honestly I am also not that experience in saying things and giving encouragement except that I had become more and more compassionate and more and more wanting God rather than anything else. I used to love power and other things that can make me rich and successful but now I want only Him and to serve Him faithfully. In order to do that, God need to break me and now with all my unforgiveness and bitterness within me, He can't. Guess what happen? This friend came to me and unexpectedly I apologised to him for keeping my anger towards him and not commit it to God. I harboured all the bitterness and angerness so that if there is any opportunity passes by, I am gonna find fault with him and laugh at him when he falls. But guess what? God gone through it and He is sort of like telling me to break my anger off with peace and love. Not hatred with hatred. Well honestly saying with my egonism very high, I honestly saying I do not want to remember all my forgiveness towards him cause that would mean unfairness to me when he makes me angry last time. Anyway I grew into hungerness for Him and with ppl beside me right now that no matter what happen, I shall be by your side in case any of you need help. I somehow or rather pray and hope that everyone of you in CF would grow in Him and obey Him in all things that you do. Let Him handle all things and not you alone. Let God be God and let you be you.. Let God handle His things such as making impossible things possible and you as His child pray hard for things to become success and act with faith. Do not let go of God. And not let anything hinders you from serving Him cause I was in that situation before. I allow myself to hinder myself away from God and do what I want to do. At the end I fall. Thank God He is full of mercy and He actually pick me back and allow me to live again. Otherwise you would see me differently than who I am right now. The backslide Christian of me.
Anyway the 2nd thing I am learning now is this. Mun Yee, as being my closest kai mui is helping and lending me a hand to teach me how to be a good Christian and good brother. Well in order to help her knowing God, I need to help myself knowing Him too. It is a win-win situation though. Well it is hard to teach someone to know God though but what we had gone through, we actually share to them, helping them and passing down our knowledge about God like how we passing down our baton when we are no longer in leadership position and with the hope that they would be better than us. We ought to slowly watering the seed that had been planted unto others so that there would be no birds or no hindrance that make it cannot grow. In fact, if we got any extra fertilizer, we ought to use it nurture the person so that that particular person would grow into a smooth Christian. So with this in mind, I believe that we need to walk the truth and not just say the truth and that's what God is doing in my life right now. Of course there is ups and downs, but with God in us, above us, in front of us, behind us, below us, beside us, who can be against us then. Am I right?
Anyway gtg oredi.. The computer screen is a bit too bright for me to type anymore. So God bless and I hope that I am not blogging out of topic again, huh? And be long-winded again? =( God bless and take care...